How To Set Up A Virtual Video Game PlayDate
When kids want to play video games remotely, here's how to do it safely
Virtual video game playdates are something we had to figure out “on the fly” but I’m glad we did. Overall, they have been a great way for our kids to spend time with friends and family members when in-person isn’t possible.
Why you should consider ‘Virtual Video Game Play Dates’
Parents cringe a little when the idea of online game play first comes up— it sounds super scary. I certainly did to me. But there are some compelling reasons (I think) to give it a try!
Working Parent Logistics - in-person playdates can be really really hard for working parents (me! they are hard for me!). While my husband and I both WFH, our work situations are such that hosting playdates during the week is almost impossible.
Long Distance Friendships - we have some important people— a best friend and a an awesome same-age cousin— that we want our kids to stay close with despite being out of state.
As it turns out, online gaming is really great for both of these scenarios.
General Tips
Make sure you have a console that lends itself to safe online video gaming. We do this with Nintendo Switch
Vet each game before allowing it. I highly recommend researching any video game through CommonSense Media. I trust their ratings more than the official ESRB rating.
Treat online video game sessions like an in-person playdate.
Take homework and chores are taken into consideration if this is during the week
Make it a timed event. We learned that if we didn’t set an end time the kids would stay online until kicked off and the abruptness didn’t make for an easy transition.
Consider allowing the kids to video chat while playing.
Pro— they talk to each other more which is kinda the point.
Con— they probably need to borrow your phone or laptop to face-time or zoom which can be a hassle.
How to set up (for Nintendo Switch)
I like the Switch because it has the most parental controls and a lot of games geared to younger kids. I wrote all about setting up the parental controls lat week - read it here).
If your kid has a Switch and a friend (or cousin!) they’d like to play video games with, here’s how to safely connect them without inviting in the rest of the internet.
What you need
Two kids with Nintendo Switches who want to play together.
Corresponding adults who can communicate with each other during set up.
Step One: Establish the groundrules.
To make this a virtual playdate, you need to consider: How long will this playdate last? How frequently will you allow online playdates? Will you allow the kids to facetime each other while they play?
Answer these questions for yourself, then get on the same page with the other adult. If you and your counterpart aren’t texting already, now is the time.
Step Two: Set up & link relevant accounts
Each grown up needs to do these steps for their kid.
Set Up a Nintendo Account on the Nintendo website- Go to the Nintendo Account website and sign in to the admin Nintendo Account. Each Nintendo Account allows you to sign up you family as a group with one admin. The admin can add or remove members from the family group, assign roles like parent/guardian or supervised to other members, and adjust the Nintendo Account profile settings for users aged 12 and under in the family group.
Create a new admin Nintendo Account if you don't have one.
Add your kid by Selecting Family group > Add your kid.
Set up a User Account on the Nintendo Switch Console. From the HOME menu on the Switch, go to System Settings > Scroll down to highlight Users, then Add User > Next > Select an icon > Enter a nickname when prompted > OK.
Link them. From the Switch Set Up You will be given the option to link a Nintendo Account to your user account. Do it.
If you aren’t prompted to link you may have already done this and forgotten :)
Step Three: Start the Playdate & Finish Setting Up
Facetime your counterpart at the designated time.
Go over the ground rules with the kids.
Have the kids friend each other on their devices— Either your kid must accept a friend request sent to them or the other kid must accept a friend request sent by your kid. Its easiest to do this over the phone.
To send a friend request: Select your user icon (My Page) on the HOME Menu, and then select Add Friend > Send Friend Request
To accept a friend request on the HOME Menu select accept a friend request.
To link using a Friend Code. Find your code on this same page, check the right side of the screen to find your friend code (see below).
For more click here
Step Four: Pick a game
Go through the games your kid has and the games their friends have. Pick one that is age appropriate, lends itself to 2 player play, and that both kids have.
Step Five: Start a game
Find the Play with Friends area in the game menu. In there you can
host a game - you create a game and then send the game code to your friend
join a game - where you enter a game code from a friend
From here you can let the kids start playing! Its up to you whether you let them stay on your phones from here.
Paying subscribers can read on to learn our favorite virtual play date games (so far), my older son’s best tip about setting up gameplay with friends and my younger son’s answers to my required pre-game questionnaire.
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